Let's Give Em Somethin To Talk About

I read a friend's blog entries from yesterday, one in particular that got me thinking.

I'm a BBW. Now, in and of itself that doesn't particularly mean anything to me. I was "thin" in high school but looked gaunt, my face had no character, my eyes were sunken and my cheeks had hollows. Thin for me is around 160 pounds on my 5'4 frame. I'd tell you what I weigh now, but I have no idea. I don't even have a certain clothing size that I wear since different brands cut their clothes either smaller or larger than a "standard" Lane Bryant size. I just bought the dress you see up there in a size 18 for Patrick's wedding, if that gives you any idea.

Since I gained weight in my 20's my face has filled out, I've gotten a few (a very few) smile lines around my eyes and my figure rounded out. I've always had that hourglass/figure 8 shape to me, but now it's just well, MORE hourglassy. I have a full face and a small tummy but a big ol butt and boobs to match.

This brings me to one of the salient points I'm making. I belong to one group of people over 40 that are BBW's and admirer's. It's not a dating group, it's a conversation group and we do discuss all manner of things political and personal-we're just a bunch of friends. I received an email off list pointing out that according to my pictures, I'm not a BBW so why was I in that group soliciting attention of men to the detriment of other women there? Aside from being shocked that I'm not considered a BBW, I was hurt since I hadn't ever thought I was soliciting anything, in fact I didn't talk about my grandfather's death or the wedding my son is having. I talk about the weather and politics and whether Big Brother will be back on CBS this summer. I don't flirt, mainly because, well that brings me to point 2-

I dont' like skinny old men. I just don't. I have a definate and distinct preference for a man within 10 years of my age who is tall and heavyset. I totally and completely get turned on by big men. Does that make me shallow? Am I a hypocrite because I won't give a short skinny guy a chance? Nope-not at all. Y'see-I myself am in that nebulous category of too big for men that like average sized women and too small for men that prefer BBWs. I understand that and personally, just don't care. I'm whip smart and funny as hell and usually pretty generous-a fabulous cook and the hostess that spoils you so much you never want to leave. If you don't like the package it comes in, that's ok, cause I do and everyone has their own tastes.

To sum up-the reasons people are physically attracted to someone are myriad, sometimes twisted and always impossible to figure out. You like what you like and there's no shame in that. Personally, when I get involved with someone, I want them to want my body just as much as they want my mind. I really don't want someone who dates me "in spite of" my shape because they like hanging around me. You can be my friend. Maybe. If you make the cut...

Tuesday February 27, 2007 - 08:43am (EST)